12 Ways to Love Thyself

As women, naturally we forget to put ourselves first and and give to the most important people in our lives, ourselves. We are naturally made as nurturers, wanting to give to others and make sure the needs of loved ones in our lives are met. Also, we get so caught up in the daily routine of our lives, the thought of self-love doesn’t cross our minds. We need to find ways to love ourselves more deeply! This is an important aspect in anyone’s life because it is the key to happiness. Simple things that we sometimes expect from others that can be given to us, by us, can provide much more satisfaction. Whether you have someone in your life or you are single, spending time with yourself can can be so fulfilling. The older I get, the more I realize being selfish to some extent is important in order to provide self love. It’s OK to splurge once a month, turn off your phone for a couple of hrs, or even take yourself out on a date. It keeps your sense of self in tact and appreciation for individuality which can be lost in one’s life. Whether you are single or madly in love I challenge you to do one or even five or more of these simple self love acts that will guarantee appreciation for YOU! Besides it is Valentine’s season and no one can love you better than the girl who looks at you in the mirror everyday!

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1. Forgive Yourself : It’s easy to turn on the how-could-you-hurt-me song to turn the pain of a situation that has occurred in your life to someone else. However when you decide to self reflect, realize, and take self accountability for your own actions is when self maturity begins. Letting go of pain is very imperative to life to teach, let positivety back into your life, focus on other relationships, and ultimately improve your overall well being. No forgiveness is not always easy, but it is the final form of love however it is given to you.

2. Stand in front on the mirror in your birthday suit and say to yourself ” You are Beautiful”… and mean it! : Yes I said it and this is a must for every girl and woman. Society’s definition of beauty has made us want to shame our bodies. In the name of love, loving each and every part of you will allow you to open up the world with less insecurity. I’ve done it and when you do it for the first time, take a moment to say “you are beautiful.” It can be overwhelming in a beautiful way, but it was my birth of a new confidence.


3. Slip on a sexy bra and undies: I am addicted to all things bra and panties and I believe taking the time to pick out a bra and underwear, even when you are the only one to lay eyes on you in them, makes you feel that much prettier and a little sexy knowing you look damn good in your lacy cheekies!

4. You time 15 min before and after your day : Taking a little time to meditate, listening to a song to inspire you, read a book, or whatever your heart desires gives you love and the ability to receive it better. A little goes a long way.

5. Clean your vanity and gift your self a bouquet of your favorite flowers : I’ve done this once and it put a huge smile on my face. Taking the time to beautify your personal space and taking the time to pick out flowers just for you allows you to see how much you don’t need to wait for others to show appreciation to you. Do it yourself.

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6. Date your self : Many times we all get wrapped up in not having someone to take us out and show us a good time. You may feel like a fish out of water at first, but its OK. Take yourself to a movie, attend that weekly painting class, go listen to poetry, go to the beach, even take yourself out to eat. Enjoying the company of one’s self is fulfilling in and out of a relationship. You will learn to appreciate you and love that.


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7. Clean Your House: Ever get caught with a surprise guest and your home is a wreck? That can be embarrassing and even worse, shows how much you care for your home. Home is where the heart is and taking the time to clean your home brings a sense of appreciation for what you have. Even giving your home a beautified look like a hotel is always great to do a couple of times of year.

8. Run yourself a bath, listen to your favorite songs, and read a great book : Taking the time for a bit of relaxation is often something we don’t spend enough time doing,( at least in my world). Relaxation is a must, no exceptions!

9. Spend a little more time getting dolled up : A little TLC never hurt no body! I do this probably more than usual, but taking pride in how you look when you step out the door is a reflection of you. Take a little more care to your makeup, add some curls to your usual straightened hair, put on a a flirty heel. Turn an extra head or two!

10. Create confident thoughts with affirmations and read them to yourself : Yes it’s a “Being Mary Jane” act, ( hit show on BET ), but it’s a very useful tool that keeps your life in perspective daily. Reminding yourself to keep going, to simply smile via a note on your wall, keeps your self-motivation going.




11. Sing Your Favorite Song : Yes, you are the Next American Idol within your four walls! We all want to let out our inner Whitney and Mariah it’ll bring you joy, guaranteed.

12. Treat Yourself to a Massage: This is a piece of advice I need to follow myself. I have never experienced a professional massage in a spa and I know it’s a treat that needs to be experienced and much appreciated. It’s a splurge that will not be regretted.


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